Why does she do this?

346>Ok, I really need help. I%26#039;m going to give you some background on the situation first. I%26#039;m 23 y/o and I%26#039;ve been married for 2 years. For the past 4 years my mom has been addicted to pain medicine (I%26#039;m talking 120 vicodin 10/500 per day) and only recently has come off of them. There was a two week period where she was majorly depressed after coming off of them and she then after got anti-depressants. My dad died suddenly at 55 from a massive heart attack in Feb. My mom has also just recently found out that she has ovarian cancer. I moved my mom from North Carolina to Florida to be near me since none of my other family will take care of her. I live in a duplex and I moved her on the other side of it. She is still really depressed and even more so since she found out she has cancer. My mom and I have had the most amazing relationship up until the drugs started four years ago. Now, it%26#039;s like she%26#039;s always mad at me. She says she%26#039;s a burden and she should just die. I resent this because of my
Reply:oh i dont know. she sounds very depressed. i feel for you. this is a huge responsiblity to take on. you will need strong boundaries. take time out for yourself. do the best you can for her. perhaps she needs grief counselling. maybe shorterm antidepressants until the counselling kicks in. look after yourself. and remember that you need separate time to grieve your dad also. hugs.
Reply:When your mom came off the painkillers, did she do it through a program of some sort? Quitting painkillers is very diffficult and causes severe depression. Even if she%26#039;s been off them for a long time, the underlying causes of why she took them are probably still there. The best thing is for her to go to NA meetings or other such group. She can talk to people who will understand her and not judge her. You cannot possibly take on all the emotional pain she%26#039;s going through and it%26#039;s not fair for you to have to. She needs more help than you can give her. You have your own life and your own grief to deal with. You can be there for her, but she should have other sources of support. Can you maybe find her a councelor or psychiatrist and also find local NA groups she can join? She might be hesitant at first and say she doesn%26#039;t need to go to such a place, but if she tries it, she%26#039;ll see that it can really help her. Good luck to you both and I%26#039;m sorry you%26#039;re both going through so much.