495>Hello. I know its a difficult question but I have nobody next to me to ask. I have an alcoholic father, I have cancer, and too little money. I am 23 , male. Sometimes this is so much stress especially since my father is not supportive and drinks and is being mean to me, that I want to hurt myself. Its like I need to experience physical pain so that emotional pain doesn%26#039;t get in the way, if you know what I mean. Its just hurting so bad emotionally, and anti-depressants aren%26#039;t helping. Can you give me advice how to deal with this urge to hit myself or do something else harmful?
Reply:Whoa! Let%26#039;s take this one step at a time. You are 23, basically no $, and a bummer of a dad, now you have cancer? You do have a load that you need to dump quick.
Ok, if you live in the USA, get over to the local Social Services [Welfare] and talk to someone, now. You need to get away from the living situation to somewhere you can deal with your life with help from the outside in a peaceful manner.
[if you have a religious preference...please see someone to tell this to...perhaps someone might help somehow.]
You should be able to get some help from %26#039;welfare%26#039; at your age and in your condition. Hurting yourself is not good. You haven%26#039;t caused your father to be the way he is! That%26#039;s his doing, all by himself. Your hurting yourself is not correction the issues. Has one wound helped fix your dad%26#039;s problem? If you harm yourself, is it going to help you financially?
If you are taking anti-depressant meds., then you need to understand that the meds. alone are not going to help you. If you are still %26#039;angry%26#039; perhaps the therapist or Dr. is not getting the correct meds. or providing you with good enough counseling. Ask for another therapist or psychologist.
These negative emotions and confusions are not helping you at all physically nor mentally! You need to get some help in all of your problems...and it is available, just ask.
Please check out alllll of the available cancer treatment programs...there has to be ONE that can help you with this. Welfare services should recommend somewhere or some one that can help with medical finanaces. That is enough to be concerned about w/out having to deal with your parent. You haven%26#039;t mentioned your mother...so I won%26#039;t pry. Best of luck to you!!
Reply:hey.deep breathing works for me.or long walks w/ my dog.relate to you wanting the physical pain to try to lessen the emotional pain.it sucks,i do the same.would you be able to get a therapist?its helped an awful lot.well good luck.take care.ever wanna shoot the **** ya know where i%26#039;m at.:}
Reply:take up a high energy hobby, like running or get a heavy bag and go to town on it .
Reply:See stress, and self harm, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris on pages 7, and 16
Reply:Forget about your father, he has his own issues and you cannot change this. As for the anit depressants, they do more harm than good. You have cancer, and need to start eating right. If you have never prayed, or known God.. then get to know him. I would start reading the New Testament first.. and get a sweetness and peace that only Christ can give you right now. I would suggest Yoga and meditation, deep breathing. You are loved .... and there are no simple answers, but fight for your life for now....so do not harm yourself. Love yourself and give that love to yourself.
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